Sitting in your car always felt safe. I don’t mind driving, but seeing you take the lead adds that extra level of security. All the songs that play are the exact same ones on my playlist. Volume goes low every time I speak as if I am announcing something important. Those moments made me feel like something is there, until my actual reality sets in.
The bright lights of the supermarket right up front. “I only need two things” I whisper uncertainly because I know it’s is not true. Hughes of red, pink, white, grace the entrance. Valentine’s Day is fast approaching, an unnecessary reminder of how invisible it feels to be single.
The stuffed animals seemed to bring comfort to thoughts racing in my mind. Just last week we were in your car talking about all the stuff we have in common. It’s crazy how one person can revolve around your world when they’re not around. You find an excuse to bring them up just to have their comfort there. Hoping it’s a mutual feeling, they’re no signs of telling.
Making my way towards the candies to see what they have to offer. I stop right in front of my favorites, Ferrero Rocher. Remembering that comment that you made about them my mind starts to transport to the times where everything felt so right, like it could be something serious. But it’s too late to know what could have been.
After the daydreaming stops, I proceed to find the items I was looking for. While on line to pay I keep repeating to myself “if he wanted to, he would.” I try to keep myself grounded instead letting delusional thoughts take over. If he really wanted to get to know me, it would have happened earlier.
By the time I got home I was trying to wrap my head on why I still think about you. Is it the way you looked when talking about your hobbies, maybe the way I didn’t know how to act around your presence, or how you would give me the world with just one look. As I’m still thinking my phone goes off. I look over and see one unread message from you.