De-Escalation Techniques: What They Are & How to Implement Them by Paul Angel Perdomo

“Whoever fights monsters should see to it that in the process he does not become a monster” - Nietzsche

Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche’s quote suggests that when confronting evil or negativity, we must be careful not to let the fight corrupt us and transform us into the very thing we are opposed to. De-escalation refers to the methods and actions taken to reduce the intensity of a conflict, whether physical, emotional, or verbal. The purpose of de-escalation is to employ communication strategies or other techniques during an encounter to stabilize, slow, or diminish any conflict without resorting to violence or excessive force. Here’s one helpful method.

Jeremy Pollock’s The Seven Phases of the Escalation Cycle offers a roadmap for understanding how minor frustrations can result in full-blown conflicts.

1. Calm: The first stage is when the person is in a calm and stable phase, that person is typically cooperative, communicative, and able to engage positively towards others. Behavior includes relaxed body language, regular breathing patterns, and a general sense of well-being

2. Trigger: The second stage marks the transition from a calm state into the onset of the agitation phase. The person encounters a specific event or circumstance that initiates the escalation process. The triggers can vary and may include interpersonal relationships, perceived slights, unmet needs, and environmental changes. Useful strategies to identify a trigger; are to provide support, create a quiet space, maintain composure, and offer solutions.

3. Escalation: This phase is where things can start to move a bit quicker on the acting-out cycle. The person in this phase begins to experience a heightened emotional state, often characterized by annoyance, frustration, or even anger. Identified triggers: Environment changes (loud noises or overcrowded spaces), Interpersonal conflicts (disagreements and miscommunication), and Personal stressors (fatigue, hunger, and deadlines). Solutions encourage open communication, provide clear and consistent instructions, and ensure individuals have access to resources and support.

4. Higher Escalation: This crucial phase marks a significant increase in the intensity of the person’s behavior within the acting-out cycle that will reach the crisis point. During this phase, the behavior becomes more pronounced unchecked. Behaviors include heightened agitation, verbal aggression, potentially threatening actions, and increased hostility such as shouting, using profanity, or making threatening gestures. Helpful tips: monitor changes in behavior, create a safe environment, set clear boundaries, and provide support.

5. Crisis: The sixth peak phase is the most intense where the behavior reaches the maximum intensity, such as physical aggression, self-harm, and verbal outbursts. Helpful tips: stay calm, maintain a safe distance, use clear and simple communication, and avoid physical restraint.

6. De-Escalation: Following the peak acting-out behavior, the person begins to regain control and calm down to the heightened emotional state. Helpful tips include providing a calm environment, using supportive communication, avoiding blaming, and allowing time to recuperate. Useful phrases to de-escalate: “I’m sorry for any frustration this caused you” or “I understand that you feel this way” & change the subject: If appropriate, try to redirect the conversation to a more positive topic.

7. Recovery: The final phase of the acting-out cycle where the person returns to a calm state and normal behavior resumes. The phase is important because it represents the opportunity to reinforce positive behaviors and prevent future escalation. Observable behaviors in the recovery phase are noticeable relaxation in body language, normalized speech patterns, and willingness to re-engage in routine activities. Examples of recovery behaviors in difficult or stressful situations are customer service, workplace conflict, and community interaction.

To navigate the 7 stages of the cycle as follows is to know the stages of the cycle and what to do whenever you are in troubled waters.

Life is a stressful rollercoaster that everyone rides on. We all deal with worries about modern living; family, finance, school, adulthood, and the unknown future. It’s important to control our emotions in order to avoid conflicts at work, at school, or in our personal lives.

✤ Article written for the PCCC Wellness Center